Divorce isn’t just a legal process — it’s one of the most emotionally overwhelming experiences a person can face. Whether you initiated it or not, divorce can stir up sadness, guilt, anger, fear, and confusion. Left unprocessed, these emotions can spill over into every part of your life, affecting your health, your children, your career, and your relationships.
Crystal Givens knows this firsthand. When her own marriage ended, she remembers the crushing mix of sadness, anger, and disbelief. She wanted someone to sit with her and simply ask, “Crystal, what happened? Why are you here?” Instead, she found herself in a system that only wanted facts, not feelings.
It was through the tools of grief recovery that Crystal learned how to process those emotions, honor her losses, and find clarity in the midst of chaos. Now, as an Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist with EBB and FLOW COS, she helps others walk the same path — moving from emotional overwhelm toward peace and healing.
How do you process the overwhelming emotions of divorce without letting them overtake your daily life?
Crystal Givens:
“As a grief specialist, I help people understand that the emotions around divorce—whether it’s sadness, anger, or fear—aren’t something to push away. When we try to ignore or bury them, they tend to come out sideways in our health, relationships, or work.
Instead, I guide clients through structured tools that allow them to express, acknowledge, and release those feelings in a safe and intentional way. This makes space for clarity and helps keep emotions from spilling over into every part of daily life.”
What are healthy ways to cope with anger, sadness, or guilt during divorce?
Crystal Givens:
“Grief is our normal and natural reaction to the loss of marriage; it’s the end of the hopes, dreams, and expectations we had for the relationship. Therefore, these emotions are natural and need a safe outlet.
Some healthy ways include:
- Talking with someone trained to listen without judgment (that’s the work I do through the Grief Recovery Method®).
- Writing or journaling to get the thoughts out of your head and onto paper.
- Using specific grief recovery tools taught in the program.
- Giving yourself permission to feel it all, rather than ‘being strong’ or rushing into distraction.
Healthy coping isn’t about silencing the emotions—it’s about giving them a voice.”
Why do I still feel grief even though I was the one who asked for the divorce?
Crystal Givens:
“This is so common, and it surprises many people. Even if you initiated the divorce, you’re still experiencing the loss of dreams, expectations, and shared parts of your life. Grief is about loss—not about who made the decision.
You may grieve the ‘what could have been’, the companionship you hoped for, or even the time you invested. What I do is help people honor those losses, complete what feels unfinished, and reclaim their sense of peace so they can move forward without carrying that heavy weight.”
Finding Support When You Need It Most
Divorce is overwhelming — especially when it’s your first time navigating such a life-changing transition. Everyone has an opinion, but what most people truly need is structure, compassion, and trustworthy support. As Crystal explains:
“Without the right tools, it can feel like drowning in the ocean, trying to breathe and asking yourself: What do I do? Where do I go? Who can I trust? It’s incredibly debilitating, difficult, and confusing.”
You don’t have to go through it alone.
Take the Next Step
If Crystal’s words resonate with you, she offers one-on-one grief recovery support to help you process emotions and move forward with clarity.
📞 Contact Crystal Givens
Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist, EBB and FLOW COS
Phone: 719.641.6959
Website: ebbandflowcos.com
And if you’re looking for a supportive community, join us at a Not Quite Done With Divorce Workshop. These workshops bring together legal, financial, and emotional professionals to give you the education, tools, and encouragement you need to make confident decisions and find peace in the process.
💜 Register for the next workshop here: https://notquitedonedivorce.org/divorce-workshops/
